Devil I Know - Ch1 (Updated)

(I added almost 2k words, I wasn't feeling like it was a strong chapter and I added a lot more of Catra's emotional responces to things.)

Rating: E

Relationships: Catra/Adora

Tags: Canon Divergent, Adora (She-Ra) Needs a Hug, Catra is inlove with Adora, Marriage proposal, Despara, Memory loss, Dark Adora, Horde Lord Adora, Adora is inlove with Catra, Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a happy ending,

Adora got lost in the portal and Catra just broke. She just wants this war to end so she can grieve in peace. The arrival of a horde army through a portal was unexpected, but when the commander wears Adora's face Catra has a decision to make. This may be her only chance to have Adora the way she wants her, even if it's not her Adora.

--

Some people have a bad day, well, I’ve had a bad life.

Those words had never been more true then that day. The day the world was destroyed. Well, Catra’s world was destroyed.

The day the portal closed still haunted Catra’s nights and the reality of a world without Adora was the coffin of her waking hours. She had been so desperate to destroy the world Adora thought was so worthy. The world that was more important than Catra that she never expected to succeed in removing Adora from it.

The building crumbled around her and the Princesses screamed. The moment they realised Adora wasn’t coming back was like an ice pick through Catra’s chest.

Catra sat like a statue waiting for the blonde idiot to make her grand entrance like she always did. Like she should have. But this time she didn’t and Catra felt nothing but numb.

Adora was gone…

I did it…I really did it…

I’m a monster…

“You made your choice, now live with it” Adora’s words seared in her brain like they had been branded into her memory. Did Adora know in that moment that the portal would kill her? That Catra had condemned her to death with her selfish actions.

What Catra did to Adora wasn’t death but the most excruciating erasure. It was being ripped into pieces by a cruel reality. Catra remembered how she was torn in all directions by the portal until nothing was left of her, like she never even mattered. Was that what happened to Adora? Did she feel the way Catra felt when reality swallowed her whole life and nothing was left?

Adora was alone in the end and all Catra wanted to know was if she suffered.

Without the legendary She-ra nothing stood in the Horde’s way anymore. They were able to steamroll much of Etheria as the people lost their beacon of hope and fell into the dark grasp of the Horde army.

Hordak was positive he was successful when sending a message to whoever “Prime” was and Catra rode on the wave of his success. He had renewed enthusiasm to concour Etheria in the name of Prime, but that energy would wane again in time.

After Catra sent Entrapta to Beast Island, it was clear that Scorpia was afraid to end up the same way. Scorpia continued with her overwhelming level of optimism even as Catra mourned her ex-best friend in secret. Scorpia remained at Catra’s side but Catra barely even acknowledged her existence anymore.

Catra was second in command and Weaver was in prison under the Fright Zone. Catra relished the taste of freedom she gained from that status, especially without Weaver to burst her bubble.

Catra couldn’t stay locked away to watch the war from the safety of her cameras anymore. So she started running her own special ops missions to take down towns and cities that stood in the Hordes way. She wanted to be in the thick of it and it helped…distract her.

She knew she should be happy, but the hole in her chest gaped ever wider as the days passed and the seasons changed. Her heart wasn’t in this war anymore. The stakes had changed and she didn’t care for the outcome but what else did she have but to fight for her life? She wasn’t happy and she knew she was the reason for her own misery.

Hordak grew weaker and more discouraged as time passed. His precious Prime didn’t come for him and he sulked in his sanctum day in and day out. He was a broken man and Catra stepped into his role in all but name to keep the Horde moving forward. If her job was all she had left then she was going to make it her life's greatest achievement to take Etheria from right under the princesses noses.

“You shouldn’t work yourself too hard, Wildcat,” Scorpia chastised as she entered Catra’s observation deck. It was previously Entrapta’s room but she wasn’t using it anymore being dead and all so Catra claimed the room. Catra rolled her eyes at Scorpia’s obvious attempts to be her friend even after so many rejections. She was a glutton for punishment it would seem.

“I didn’t ask for your opinion, Force Captain Scorpia,” Catra said firmly but Scorpia didn’t seem to take the hint as she came closer to Catra.

“I feel like we don’t talk anymore, how are you really doing?” Scorpia asked and Catra glared at her over her shoulder. Scorpia only smiled tentatively in response. She was not getting the message.

“I am doing my job, as you should be,” Catra scolded and heard Scorpia tapping her pincers together nervously. She should be nervous. She should be grateful Catra is even giving her the time to bother her.

“That’s not what I meant, Wildcat, I mean how are you feeling?” Scorpia tried again and Catra sighed as she put down her trackpad to turn to her current nuisance.

“You want to know how I’m feeling?” Catra asked and Scorpia smiled and nodded her head.

“I feel like one of my Force Captains is wasting my time. I feel like they are asking stupid questions that are none of their fucking business and I feel like I might need to make an example of them,” Catra snarled and Scorpia straightened up her posture. “Don’t waste your time worrying about me, Force Captain. I certainly don’t waste mine caring about you,” Catra said and watched as Scorpia’s face cracked under the harsh words but she remained silent.

“Yes Commander,” Scorpia said, her voice shaky and Catra turned back to the screens.

“Dismissed,” Catra said and heard the quickened steps behind her as Scorpia fled. It was better this way. No one should care about her. All she did was hurt anyone who ever tried. It was safer for them to stay away and stay alive.

Every day was the same thing. Fight princesses, take towns, move up the army, creep ever closer to Brightmoon as entire kingdoms fall. Catra became public enemy number one after taking out She-ra, so now every princess was out for her blood. Even the Queen of Brightmoon seemed to agree that gentle tactics were a thing of the past when it came to dealing with the Horde.

Catra was tired. She was so tired of all of this. Tired of the pain, tired of the war, tired of the knowledge of what she did to Adora. Adora left her, but Adora had tried when she asked Catra to join her. Catra was such an idiot to ignore her pleas. Maybe they could have run away together and left the war far behind them. That was a beautiful dream. But that's all it was and all it ever would be.

Catra’s time in the portal was the last happy memory she had, watching Adora being herself and carefree for just a moment. Catra was so happy just getting to bask in Adora’s glow for just one last second. It was warm on her skin and seeped into her bones but that was before the darkness took her. Any piece of happiness was ripped away as the world collapsed and Catra ruined everything.

(CW//) She remembered what it was like to fade away and it felt like such relief from the pain and the life she had made for herself. She kept fighting because what else was she going to do? What else was waiting for her? All she did was hurt people, and there was no one left in this whole universe who cared about her. (//CW)

[...]

Just like any other day, Catra had received intel which she had taken to Hordak and from his throne he told her to do as she pleased. Catra relished the freedom and today what Catra “pleased” was a bloodbath.

Catra knew the army that held this village was instructed to act as civilians to protect the front line from attack. The intel told her as much. It was a cute idea, but when her army descended, these civilians acted as an organised unit to protect the real inhabitants. Sure, there were some actual villagers around but they quickly fled at the first sign of fire and the difference was night and day between the two.

It was so satisfying to see a plan click into place.

Catra brought her team, which happened to still hold Lonnie, Rogelio and Kyle. She did not keep them close for any reason in particular, just familiar faces in the sea of nameless bodies. They worked pretty well as a squad, even now that they resented Catra for killing their precious Adora.

Adora was always the favourite, even in death.

The mere act of bringing Kyle into a warzone was asking for trouble but Catra felt the need to protect her investment. So when a particularly burly orc soldier knocked Kyle to the ground, Catra saw no other choice as she raked her claws down their back for their insolence.

“Get up,” Catra barked at Kyle who scrambled to get to his feet, returning to his position protecting Rogelio’s back. Catra cast her eyes around the battle, they were winning.

Naturally.

The battlefield was littered with Horde soldiers cutting through the opposition but a group was moving towards Catra’s squad and disobeying direct orders. Catra took in the unusual data with the speed of adrenaline pumping through her system and growled.

Their suits were too big, their stature too tall and their armour was just wrong. Catra prepared for a trap, a sloppy one at that. Didn’t these rebels know their uniforms from all the times they had dragged them through the mud?

Catra yelled coded orders to her squad and they turned their attention to the new arrivals. Catra could spot a smaller woman within the imposing frames of Horde metal. She was only a glimpse but Catra could see her black bodysuit and armour in a long red cape.

Do I need a cape… Catra considered as she prepared for an ambush. That was something to think about once the job was done. The woman wore a mask that looked like a creepy mutated version of Hordak’s face and despite the great looking suit, the mask didn’t do her any favours. Catra considered that it might be time to upgrade her look. This woman was clearly the boss. You could tell from a mile away that Catra loved that kind of recognition.

Catra’s team was a disappointment against this new enemy. Her best squad members falling underfoot far too quickly. Catra put up a hell of a fight, but once her squad was apprehended she wasn’t able to dodge when several oversized Horde soldiers managed to grapple her. Catra remembered hissing at one before the familiar burn of a stun baton hit her and she saw stars as the darkness took her.

[...]

Catra groaned as she felt the cold metal beneath her cheek. Her ears and tail twitched as she tried to rouse her consciousness into action. Her eyes snapped open and immediately she felt blinded by the bright artificial lighting in the room.

Catra blinked her eyes until she could confirm that she was alone in whatever prison she had been placed in. She tried to push herself off the ground but her arms were cuffed behind her back uncomfortably. She pulled on the cuffs to hear the familiar clink of chains which were short enough to prevent her from standing.

She leveraged her weight on the chains to test their resolve but they didn’t budge so she pulled herself upright onto her knees using the chain as an anchor and looked around the room. There wasn’t anything in the brightly lit space, not even a bed. She was surprised to realise that even the Horde had better prisons than the Rebellion it would seem. It was a strange comparison.

Catra flexed her hands carefully as she tested her claws before she manoeuvred her index finger into a hole in the cuffs she hoped was for the keys. She busied herself with the task but it wasn’t long before she had a visitor.

The woman in black had returned. Entering the room with a curious tilt of her disgusting mask. Catra could only assume the woman below the mask was even more hideous if this mask was the better option. That was the case with Shadow Weaver after all.

The woman didn’t speak but Catra felt her eyes on her which caused Catra to snarl. She hated being looked down on, both figuratively and literally. Catra did not submit.

“Are you a moron? We’re on the same side! You’re going to regret this,” Catra snapped. She would pretend that these people were Horde until the rebellion made a mistake and she would make them regret it.

“Oh, will I? You are in chains,” the woman mocked and Catra smirked as she heard the soft click of the lock and the cuffs loosening around her wrists. The cuffs hit the ground with a soft clink but Catra was already moving. She sprang forward with her claws extended. Catra was fast, but this woman had equally quick reflexes. The woman raised her sword and blocked Catra’s claws too easily. It was a mockery.

“I don’t see any chains,” Catra growled as she was pushed back, but she lunged again as soon as her feet hit a solid surface. The woman blocked her again and attempted to move her body weight and height advantage to try to push Catra down onto the ground.

Catra jumped away, landing on the ground for only a moment before she jumped on the wall and surprised the woman with a kick to her helmet. Catra landed, ready to attack again when she saw the woman wipe the blood from her split lip and glare at Catra.

“Adora?” Catra asked in a shaking voice. She was frozen in place, her eyes wide and her ears back like she had seen a ghost. She had lost hope that Adora would return from the portal. She was sure she had died or been lost to the space between realities. She had hoped that Adora would come back and even if she was still with the rebellion, she just wanted to know she was alive and it wasn’t Catra’s fault that she was dead. Had the rebellion been hiding Adora all this time?

“My name is Despara,” Adora said, lowering her sword to her side. Catra felt her ears twitch forward at the name, but she frowned deeply, this was all wrong.

“Adora what’s going on? Where have you been?” Catra asked who the hell was Despara and why did Adora think she was her? Adora looked annoyed before she made a shrill whistle for two soldiers to come into the room.

The soldiers were rough as they grabbed Catra who struggled against them. They were able to overpower her again and force her to her knees. Adora walked over to her helmet and picked it up, looking at the crack across the front from Catra’s kick.

“I will not correct you again,” Adora said coldly, and Catra’s ears twitched down at the tone even as her expression stayed defiant. The woman looked exactly like Adora, but fine, if she wanted to pretend she didn’t know Catra or even hated her, then maybe they had a lot more in common now. Had the rebellion been successful to turn Adora against her so completely or was it Catra’s actions that made her give up on her?

“You clearly don’t understand how things work in the Horde, so let me tell you, I am Hordak’s second in command. So I’ll call you what I want,” Catra said, her voice dripping with venom.

“Horde-ack. Cute” Adora said mockingly, like Hordak was simply a bug under her boot. It was…a little hot actually. “Take me to this Hordak, Kitten. I believe we have business,” Adora said, motioning for her men to bring Catra with them. Catra’s mind was reeling, trying to understand what was happening. The rebellion sent Adora and a fake Horde army to get to Hordak? Why would they do that?

Well, too bad. She wasn’t going to let her life's work fall into ruins so easily.

“My name is Catra,” Catra spat as she stumbled to walk with the two soldiers pushing her roughly. Adora glanced back at her, a slightly bewildered expression on her face that was gone in a second. Catra saw it though and it was such an Adora expression. Why was she speaking like she had never met Catra? What had the rebellion done to her?

They entered a room with a holographic map on the table in the centre. Adora walked around the other side of the map and motioned to it.

“Show me,” she said and Catra was released by the soldiers. She rubbed her arm where the metal gloves had dug into her skin as she considered her options. She chose to be difficult. She had ample practice in that and she wasn’t about to stop now.

“Oh no, I want answers first,” Catra said before she crossed her arms. Adora just smirked at her and Catra felt a flutter in her stomach at the familiar expression. She hated how her mind tried to flood with memories of the blonde, late nights and early morning whispered conversations. Training sessions and teasing each other, she had so many memories that she had tried to bury in the year that Adora was gone. Those feelings and memories made her vulnerable and that made her weak. She would not be weak anymore, not even for Adora.

“Ask,” Adora said and Catra scoffed.

“Who the fuck are you people?” Catra asked and Adora sat in her chair at the end of the table.

“We are with Prime,” Adora said and Catra felt a shiver run down her spine at the name. Hordak had been going on about Prime. Was this the response he had been waiting for after all this time?

“Who is Prime?” Catra asked next. So Adora wasn't with the rebellion? Where had she been this past year then?

“He will bathe your pathetic planet in his cleansing light,” Adora said and Catra fur tried to fluff up at the creepy phrase. Not the rebellion…

“Are you responding to Hordak’s message?” Catra asked, unfolding her arms to change her posture from a frightened kitten to someone of use. Catra wasn’t stupid, if Hordak wasn’t going to be the big dog anymore then Catra wasn’t going to fall into obscurity with him. She had no real loyaltee to him if he wasn’t the one leading anymore.

Adora seemed to notice Catra’s change of posture as she ran her blue eyes down Catra’s body. Catra felt the idiotic need to blush at the gaze but set her jaw and lifted her chin to show she wasn’t affected. Adora wasn’t going to get to her. She might have missed her and wished every night for her to be alive and somewhere out there. But Catra didn’t know this Adora, and she didn’t trust her. She wasn’t going to follow a pretty face, even if it looked like someone she once cared for.

“That is correct,” Adora said simply and Catra nodded her head before she stepped forward and pointed on the map. Catra chose her side easily, Hordak was no one to her, just a leader and expendable. If he wasn’t the strongest anymore then he wasn’t important to her.

“He's here, in the Fright Zone,” Catra said and her hard eyes met Adora’s. Adora held her gaze, looking for any sign of deception before she smirked and clicked her fingers.

“We’re going to the Fright Zone,” Adora said, still watching Catra as the soldiers saluted and left the room. Catra noticed they were alone and straightened her back. Adora stood and walked slowly around the table, watching Catra as her ears and tail twitched and her eyes tracked her every movement. She was alert and suspicious as she expected a trap.

“Tell me Catra, who was this Adora you called me?” Adora asked and tried to keep her emotions in check as she considered the woman. Adora saying her own name was surreal. She didn’t seem to recognise it at all and that knowledge settled into Catra’s stomach like a rock. “What did she mean to you?” Adora asked, stopping only a foot away from Catra to look down at her. Catra ruled her army through fear and as she looked at Adora’s face she realised she was unafraid. It was strange that Adora still seemed so sure that Catra wouldn’t harm her. Didn’t she know she had killed her once already?

“She was…a friend…” Catra settled on the words like a protective blanket and Adora narrowed her eyes.

“Do you have ‘friends’ in the Fright Zone?” Adora asked instead and Catra glared at her. Catra had no friends of her own choosing. She was alone and that's what she preferred.

“No,” she said and Adora smirked.

“Lying will not save them. I will take the Fright Zone and any who oppose me will be removed. But…perhaps we can come to a mutually beneficial arrangement,” Adora said with a cocky smile.

Catra missed that smile, but it felt so out of place after such a long time. Out of place and dangerous. It set Catras' nerves alight and on edge all at once. Catra glared and growled at the expression as she took a step back from the woman. Adora was cocky as ever but her motivations were still unknown and Catra couldn’t risk falling prey to her manipulations.

“Just what are you suggesting?” Catra spat back and Adora chuckled darkly as she ran her hand over the hologram on the table.

“Perhaps we can have a partnership,” Adora offered. Catra’s ears twitched as she looked at Adora with hard eyes as she considered it. Catra wanted a partnership, especially if Hordak was on the way out. A partnership would give her more freedom to do as she pleased and it was a step up from being second in command. All she needed to do was prove her usefulness to the new power.

“What kind of partnership?” She asked and Adora smirked.

“You help me get what I want, and I’ll help you,” she said carefully, and Catra’s eyes widened slightly. Does Adora know what Catra wants? That can’t be possible. Catra’s not even sure what she wants anymore.

“You need someone who knows the land,” Catra offered and Adora frowned.

“Not necessary. I’m sure any local could tell me what I need,” Adora said. Catra felt herself prickle with the desire to be useful.

“Not like I can, I’m the lead strategist in the Horde and I know the rebellion better than anyone,” Catra defended and Adora raised one eyebrow.

“I do not care for your world's petty squabbles,” Adora said and Catra felt her heart race. She had waited years for Adora to say she didn’t care about the stupid rebellion. If Adora didn’t care about the rebellion then her motivations were even more confusing to Catra. Was she back on the Horde’s side for good? She had what appeared to be a powerful horde army with the desire to bring Etheria to the ‘light’, whatever that meant. Was she really done with them?

“Then what do you want,” Catra asked and watched as Adora’s eyes darkened and Catra felt her heart pounding at the look in her eyes.

“I want you,” Adora said and Catra gasped. This had to be a dream. Adora wanted her, and she didn’t care about the rebellion. This was a dangerous fantasy, one she wanted desperately. But this wasn’t the same Adora that went into that portal and she was changed. So Catra couldn’t just fall into this fantasy like the life giving breath she needed. She wanted so badly for this to be real, but knowing how badly she wanted it meant she couldn’t have it. It was dangerous to want and it was dangerous to desire. Something so sweet couldn’t possibly be for her.

Catra could admit that what she really wanted was for Adora to dote and fuss and earn her attention. She wanted Adora to show how much she cared for her and fight for her. Even if Catra wasn’t going to fall for this trick Adora had laid out for her, she would take the offered partnership with both hands. It would give her the freedom she wanted and buy her time to understand where Adora really stood.

“Prove it,” Catra said simply and Adora smirked.

“With pleasure,” Adora whispered and it was as simple as that. They were partners.

[...]

Catra was surprised to learn that the small contingent of soldiers was but a fraction of Adora’s army waiting for her command. The full fleet was truly a sight to behold as they descended into Etheria.

Adora walked into the Fright Zone like she owned the place and Catra walked at her side with the army at their back. Catra felt powerful and she loved the way people looked at her in disbelief and awe. They never expected her to amount to anything, but she would show them all.

It was hard to deny the appeal of Adora’s new life. No wonder she never returned until now. Catra would have left them all behind too if Adora had tried to kill her and she got to command an army.

Catra wasn’t stupid, she was well versed in acting before someone else could hurt her first. Adora was not her friend, even if they were ‘partners’ now. She wasn’t sure that Adora remembered the portal, but she would watch her carefully to ensure she didn’t attempt to take revenge.

Catra expected Hordak to at least resist the takeover but he crumbled like a house of cards before the familiar army. He was relieved to see the towering mechanical soldiers and Catra was disgusted with how readily he wished to please this Prime person. Whoever he was.

Catra couldn’t think of anyone she would act in such a way towards but when Adora sat on Hordak’s throne, Catra had to seriously consider her reluctance to kneel. Adora looked good in power.

The Force Captains had all fallen under the new regime. It wasn’t a complicated power structure in the Horde, the strong ruled.  It was an easy thing to see that Adora had a greater army at her back so no one would dare oppose her.

“Tell me Catra, what does it take to have your loyalty?” Adora asked.

Catra had yet to kneel to the new lord and it had not gone unnoticed. Hordak was locked in a cell just like Shadow Weaver until Adora decided what to do with them. Most of the soldiers and cadets had been packed into the limited remaining cells to await their judgement once they had decided where their loyalties lay.

Catra may have bowed to Hordak once, but it had been a long time since she had taken a knee before her Lord. Catra hadn’t noticed that she had not participated in the show of fealty until it was brought to her attention. Adora had the same level of loyalty that any other lord had. Her request to be partners meant Adora’s goals were her own, for as long as she was the strongest in the Fright Zone.

“You have it, my lord,” Catra said regardless of her feelings, and Adora stood from the throne she had been sitting on. She approached Catra, who resisted the urge to keep that distance between them. She still didn’t trust that Adora wouldn’t harm her, especially after everything Catra had done to her in the past. Adora had every right to want to harm her after Catra’s attempt to kill her, but that didn’t mean Catra would let her.

“I don’t believe that for a second,” Adora said. Adora was unfortunately quite perceptive. She had always been the perfect little soldier but she was an even more perfect Commander. She ruled with an unquestionable authority that Catra could only admire.

“What makes you say that?” Catra asked, looking up at the blonde with a stern gaze. She was unwilling to buckle under Adora’s authority, she wasn’t that kind of woman.

“You turned on Hordak the second you realised I would be taking control,” Adora said and Catra clenched her jaw.

“I did. You are clearly the stronger lord,” Catra said. She wondered if Adora would react positively to a little praise. Adora frowned. Apparently not.

“And if another were to show greater strength than I, you would turn on me just the same,” Adora said and Catra considered that. She doubted there was anyone as strong as She-ra in the whole universe, so siding with the princess of power was a pretty safe bet. She didn’t say that though, her lip curled at the accurate assessment.

“I guess it's in your best interest to be the strongest then,” Catra said and Adora gave a small smile which made Catra’s heart clench at the familiarity of it. Catra had seen such shy little smiles many times over the years, where Catra took the time to praise Adora for something unrelated to their training. The tentative way she would look at Catra like she had hung the moons.

“I suppose you are right,” Adora said and reached out to touch Catra. The action was too familiar, bringing forward too many memories of touches Catra tried to bury. Catra moved out of her reach just to stop the way her past assaulted her. Adora shook her head and clenched her hand before she turned away.

“Dismissed,” Adora said and Catra paused for just a moment before she left the room. She wondered for a moment if she should have allowed Adora to touch her. Maybe she remembered more than she was letting on. But it wasn’t safe and she still didn’t know what Adora wanted from this partnership. Every conversation seemed to leave her with more questions. She wanted Catra for some reason and Catra wasn’t sure what the depths of that interest was.

She considered going to her room but instead turned towards the prison deep below the Fright Zone. She had some people to visit.

[...]

Catra found her team reasonably easily. The whole squad was crammed into one cell and Catra almost wished she had the control to get them out. Almost.

“I hope you’re here to release us,” Lonnie asked as she got to her feet and walked towards the green glowing door. Catra chuckled. Lonnie was a thorn in her side, but she was a good soldier. Catra kept her around for her expertise but not her lip.

“Not yet,” Catra said and Lonnie huffed. “You’ll have to kneel to get out of here,” Catra said and Lonnie frowned.

“Of course. How did you manage to not be on this side of the forcefield?” Lonnie asked and Catra shrugged as she picked at her nails.

“The new lord likes me,” Catra said and Lonnie rolled her eyes.

“Great…people are talking about that, you know. Is that true? That it’s Adora?” Lonnie asked and Catra glared at her. It was just like Lonnie ruining her moment and focusing on Adora. Everything was always about Adora.

“You’ll have to wait till you get out to find out,” Catra teased and Lonnie sighed heavily.

“Your reaction says enough,” Lonnie said, going back to her spot on the only bed in the room and sitting beside Kyle. “Come back when you’re letting us out,” Lonnie said, clearly done with the conversation. Catra did not appreciate being dismissed by one of her own soldiers but Lonnie was bullheaded and never bowed to Catra’s change in status. Well she’d have to bow soon enough if Adora really was going to make them partners in their takeover of Etheria.

“Be grateful you haven’t been put to death for your shoddy work on the battlefield,” Catra threatened and Lonnie just ignored her. Catra didn’t waste any more of her time here and stalked back towards her room.

[...]

Catra didn’t know how long it took her to fall asleep but she awoke the next morning to a knock on her door. She was confused and startled by the noise, her claws digging into the bed as she sat upright. Whatever idiot decided to wake her was about to have a much worse morning for disturbing her sleep. She was having a nice dream for once, one in which Adora didn’t hate her.

She growled as she ran her hands through her hair and opened the door. A larger than usual soldier was standing in the hall and it reminded Catra like a bolt of lightning that the previous day's events were real. Adora was back.

“Lord Despara has requested you,” The soldier said and Catra nodded her head. The new soldiers were positioned around the Fright Zone instead of the original guards and it unsettled Catra to know they were watching her.

Adora had been efficient as she took control of the Fright Zone. It wasn’t particularly hard when Hordak handed over his loyalty on a silver platter but Adora didn’t take any chances. Catra was a little surprised that she had been allowed to walk free without a guard. Especially after she resisted openly pledging her loyalty to the new lord. She supposed that freedom had a price and Adora would tell her the cost soon enough. She would have to wait and see if that interest turned out to be good or bad in the end.

A small childish part of Catra wanted Adora’s interest to be pure and based on the feelings that had been growing between them until Adora left the Horde. She wanted Adora to choose her when she had all the choices in the world. But Catra wasn’t so naive anymore, what she wanted now was certainty. She wanted to know where she stood, and Adora was going to have to prove herself to Catra for a change.

Catra knew how to walk a thin thread when it came to her superiors' desires and Adora would be no different. If Adora still had affection for Catra then it would be easier to convince her to follow Catra’s advice. It was so like Adora to want to be the best. Catra once built her life on her understanding of Adora. She had been wrong about Adora in the end, but she knew the blonde well enough to get what she wanted now. Whatever that was.

Adora was sitting on her throne when Catra entered the room. Catra came to stand at the bottom of the stairs and looked up at Adora, awaiting orders. She did not bow and it seemed to only entertain Adora further.

“Come here,” Adora instructed and Catra started up the stairs. Adora stood as Catra approached and Catra felt the height difference as if it was a mile high.

“I have a question for you,” Adora said casually as she looked at Catra. Catra had expected this. She was sure Adora had questions about the environmental changes or political changes that happened since she had been gone. Intel is important no matter where you are.

“Yes my lord,” Catra said and Adora squinted at her suspiciously before she continued like Catra had not spoken at all.

“Marry me,” Adora said and Catra couldn’t hold back her gasp. Adora seemed pleased by her surprise but Catra’s mind was reeling at the request.

Catra had many fantasies of hearing those words from the blonde, since she had read about it in a contraband book as a child. She was sure she had spoken to Adora about it when they were in their early teens. Best friend which were full of emotion and affection for each other and at the time they didn’t know how to express it. Promising to be together forever felt like the sweetest relief for that pressure.

“W-what?” Catra stuttered and Adora smirked.

“I believe the correct tradition is to provide something of value, what is it you desire?” Adora asked, not explaining herself at all.

Catra felt like a fish out of water. Gasping and cold in an unknown environment, tasting air for the first time in her life. It was ridiculous how her once dead heart rushed with the same sweet relief she had felt as a teenager when she looked into Adora’s blue eyes.

“Why?” Catra blurted out quickly and Adora raised an eyebrow. “Why do you want to marry me?”

“I see no better way to link your life to mine,” Adora said and Catra glared.

If all Adora wanted was a link with Catra and to raise her up or bring her down with her then Catra had issues with that. She would rather rise or fall on her own and not on the coattails of someone else. More than that, Catra wanted this to mean something to the blonde. She wanted Adora to want Catra like Catra had wanted her once. She wanted her to crave her touch and her company like she needed her next breath. She wanted Adora to feel the same and not just bind her like chains.

“Why does my loyalty mean so much to you?” Catra asked, it was a laughable idea that Adora would marry her just to have her fealty. There had to be more than that, but maybe that was Catra’s wishful thinking.

“Because, your eyes are from my dreams and I believe we will do great things together,” Adora said and Catra gaped at her. Adora dreamt of Catra? Did she really remember her? What did that mean? Why wasn’t she acting like she knew who Catra was?

Adora was watching her closely and Catra’s mind was racing to try to work out what this could all mean. Catra knew she wanted to become indispensable to the new lord and maybe even whoever Prime was, but she hadn’t considered that Adora might want an actual relationship with her. Did Adora really know what she was asking?

“You want to have a relationship with me?” Catra asked, a little dumbfounded.

“You are aware what marriage means, right?” Adora asked with a small smirk on her lips. Catra hated that the blonde was enjoying her fluster. Catra glared at her. Her heart was screaming yes but her head was screaming no. She needed time to think this through to untangle her feelings and make a logical decision.

“I would like some time to consider,” Catra said and Adora nodded her head.

“Very well, you can discuss it with your squadron,” Adora said and Catra felt a drop in her stomach. Adora worked out the camera system just fine without her it would seem. Catra didn’t need anyone and she stubbornly didn’t need to speak to anyone else regarding her decision.

“No need, it's just a lot to think about,” Catra said, her mind racing to consider the offer. She knew Adora needed to give her an item of importance to her and Catra wasn’t going to make it easy. Catra wasn’t going to tell Adora what she wanted, or what would be important to Adora. If she was lucky Adora would give her that stupid sword of hers and Catra would hold the power of She-ra in her hands. That idea alone was what tipped her towards her choice. Adora had a lot of power at her fingertips and being on her good side, regardless of what that looked like, was what Catra needed to stay free.

“I accept,” Catra agreed and Adora looked surprised.

“So easily?” Adora asked and Catra smirked.

“No. To properly propose you have to bring me an item of great importance. I want you to show me that you know me,” Catra said. Adora had all the information she needed to find such an item, but if she didn’t, it would give Catra time to work out her next move.

She wanted to know where Adora had been for the last year and why she had changed so much. She especially wanted to know where she got an army of giant mech suits. She would find out where Adora had been and secure her own future in Primes ‘light’.

Adora’s eyes were alight from Catra’s words with the promise of a challenge. Catra smirked, maybe Adora wasn’t as different as she had originally thought.